What is it like?

Occasionally, when I mention that I started Crossfitting I am asked, "What's it like? I hear it's pretty hard."

Trying to explain what Crossfit is like is like trying to explain to a desert nomad what it's like to swim in Lake Michigan; you have to do it to truly understand.

However....

I will describe to you what it's like for me. Hopefully, you'll gain some insight from that. Usually, the process begins the night before and continues until I have actually completed the workout.

Evening, the Night Before a Workout: Ho-lee crap! He expects me to do pullups? I can barely pull up my socks, let alone pull my fat behind up to a bar! And Burpees? I HATE Burpees! I look like an elephant seal trying to make to the water! Oh shit, Wall Balls? Better get the barf bag ready.

Morning, Day of the Workout: Okay, 8 hours of work and it's off to Crossfit. It's gonna suck, but I'm not going to get any better sitting on the couch watching the tube. I wonder what's on? Is NCIS on? I can't miss the mid-season finale! Maybe I'll, skip today and go tomorrow!

Lunch Time, Day of the Workout: Half the day gone and only four hours until Crossfit. Funny, I'm not as tired today as I usually am by this time. My feet and back are actually feeling pretty good. I could probably skip today and it wouldn't hurt me.

Quitting Time Day of the Workout: Here is my exit to go home. All I have to do is turn here and I'll be warm and comfy on my couch snuggling up to the missus and catching up on NCIS. (Sigh) And I'll still be the same lump of disappointment that I was yesterday. Okay, no more excuses, nothing to it but to do it.

Entering Crossfit, Twenty Minutes Before the WoD Begins: Wow! These people look miserable! Thank GOD! I thought I was the only one that looked like that when I was working. Good Lord! That guy is in incredible shape and he's laying on the floor like he's dead. This one must be a smoker!

Workout Begins: Ya know? I might flirt with that woman if it weren't for two obstacles; 1) I'm a happily married man and 2) Judging by the way she's tossing that ball, she'd probably stomp me into a bloody mush if I offended her. How can someone that small generate that much power?

Five Minutes Into Workout: How did I get so weak??? When did I lose my ability to lift myself off the floor? I think I'm going to suggest that they have oxygen tanks somewhere around here because I sure as hell need some right now. I think they mis-marked this ball; it says '14' on it, but I swear it weighs '50'. If I can just get through this without throwing up on that woman in front of me, I'll consider this a success.

Ten Minutes Into Workout: I think with the next Burpee, I'll just stay on the floor until my blood stops burning. Uh-oh, the coach is yelling at me. What? 'Good job?' Haven't you been watching me? I can't even keep up with the scrawny, little, woman in front of me. Well crap! If she can toss that ball up there, I can do a couple of more Burpees.

Workout Complete: I feel like a wet noodle that's been run over by a truck. I should have realized that I'm in no condition to workout! Still, I managed to throw that wall ball a little better today. And the Burpees didn't hurt as much today as they did last week. Plus, skipping rope during the warm-up was waaay easier. As soon as I can talk in complete sentences, I'll be ready to go. I sure like the way people encourage each other around here.

Home After the Workout: Wow, I feel great! I haven't felt this good for a while. I did okay, too. I made it and achieved most of my goals. I'll work harder next time. I wonder what's in store for the next workout? Ho-lee CRAP! Front Squats??? What madman devises these workouts? Why not just waterboard us and get it over with???

Success

I finally made it three times in one week. The WoD was a killer for me, but I learned a couple of things;

1. Concentrate on what I'm doing. Focus on proper movement and doing the exercise correctly.
2. Forget about speed. Something I've learned from competitive shooting: Slow is smooth, smooth is fast. I'm participating with people that are half my age and worlds ahead of me in fitness. Don't try to keep up, just try to keep with it.

I have a confession to make; when I walk into the box, and I see all of the people with pained expressions on their face and sweat streaming off of them, it makes me happy to know I'm not alone. I am inspired by these people. I strive to do what they do as well as they do it. I won't mention any names, but I have witnessed remarkable athleticism from an Air Force Lieutenant, a couple of middle school teachers, and at least one new parent. They lift much heavier weights than I do, do more pushups than I do, and have a lot more stamina than I do. And those are the women!

I have learned humility, because I have learned I have much to be humble about.

BUT...

I can feel me getting stronger. I was less sore this week than last week. I could skip rope a little better this week than last week, and I recuperated faster this week than last week.

Baby steps, small victories, long term commitment. This is my new mantra.

Epic Fail

The Thanksgiving weekend did me in. Not only did I not make it to the gym, I ate everything that I wasn't supposed to. I was working Black Friday; my employer graciously provided breakfast and lunch. Same with Saturday. Unfortunately, they consisted of high-carb fast food. And I ate it.

 This is going to be a tougher battle than I thought. Nothing to do now but get back into the fight and quit making the same mistakes.

Earning My Right Arm Back

Truth time: A couple of years ago, I sustained a neck injury that caused my right arm to lose strength, specifically, my right tricep was atrophied and near useless. A month of physical therapy got me back to where I could use it again, but the damage had been done. My right tricep is weaker than I ever remember. The heaviest thing I could lift with it was a gallon of milk. I hated that fact, but I figured it was the result of my own bad decisions, The Wages of Sin, so to speak.

Today, the WoD included pushups. As I was struggling through the WoD, I noticed that I felt my right arm "firing up". I could actually feel my tricep getting pumped. Was it my imagination? I need someone 'in the know' to tell me if it's possible for an atrophied muscle to recover. If it is, I figure that the work I'm putting in is the way to earn my right arm back.

By the way, Susie the instructor is a great teacher. She knows the mechanics and she can do the work. I can't begin to express how impressed I am with this whole experience. The more involved I become with this bunch, the more I want to be involved. Soooo, to any out-of-shape, over-the-hill, couch potatoes that stumble across this blog, I say this: find a Crossfit in your area and go there. The people you meet will, by themselves, be worth the trip.

Getting Back into Alignment

I forgot to mention that I went in for an adjustment with Dr. Bahr yesterday. I figured that it would benefit me in that it would help my body complete the movements if it were properly aligned. I was right. There is something profound about having your entire body relax simultaneously. I hadn't even realized that anything was wrong until I went in to her. It turned out that my left leg was an inch shorter than my right, and that I had a curve in my spine.

One of the things I appreciate about her method is that she doesn't twist you around. Everything is done on a flat plane and no torque is administered to your spine. I'm not saying that those who do twist you are wrong, it's just that, when I originally injured my back in 1994, my doctor cautioned me to never put too much twist into my spine for fear of further injury.

This also translates into a better workout because your body is evenly distributing the work load. If you live in the Rapid City area, I enthusiastically recommend her. I'm also trying to get her to come and try Crossfit to see what it's all about. That could result in a very positive synergy between the two. Let's keep our fingers crossed.

Back in the Box

First day back after several days off to move. Today's WoD was a smoker that included Burpees, although what I was doing would be more accurately named "Flop-ees". No matter; I was there. That was what I kept telling myself when the suck got bad, "I'm still here!"

It made sense at the time.

Early Signs of Life

I haven't been to the Box this week (yet) for 2 reasons: an erratic work schedule and we're moving. Now, there are few things in life I hate more than moving. I've done way too much of it and, frankly, I'm sick of it. This move isn't too bad in that we're only moving 60 feet down the hall to a larger apartment but, it still sucks because I have to move everything with just me and a hand truck.

On the plus side, lifting and moving stuff isn't nearly as tough this time as it was when we moved in to the old place. By the end of the move last time, I was spent, sore, pissed off, and disgusted. This time I'm just pissed off (Did I mention that I hate moving?) I could feel myself using the stuff I learned at Black Hills Crossfit to lift and maneuver couches and freezers and whatnot. I take this as an indication that I'm on the right path.

Pride and Ego

One of the unpleasant things I've learned about myself in the last two weeks is just how large my ego is. I promised myself that I would leave my pride outside when I went into Crossfit, but it's difficult to do when doing so simultaneously shatters the illusions about myself. Like many, I generally believe myself capable of handling any contingency that comes my way. And, like many, I'm wrong. Were I to find myself hanging from a tree branch or a roof, I would be unable to hold my own weight. I would fall and suffer whatever fate awaited me. Why? Because I am not strong enough to hold up my own weight.

Then, there is the pushup. I am barely capable of doing ten "modified" pushups. A modified pushup is what I, in less enlightened times, called a "girl pushup"; knees on the floor, body straight, hands shoulder width apart. I hate that I have to do these, but I accept that they must be done. Rather than wallow in my shame, I embrace it. I accept myself as I am, and I look forward to what I will be.

I have the power to change.

Nutrition, Step 1

One of the things that I've come to realize is that my diet is crap. I eat too much of the wrong things. To change that, I've had to make some profound changes in my way of thinking and in my diet. First, portions must become smaller. Second, less grain-based food and more protein and vegetables. Also, Dr. Kimberly Bahr has recommended some vitamin supplements from NutraMetrix. I started them this week, so it's too early to tell if there is any change, but I'm fairly certain they can't hurt.

Also, working out is going well. The workouts are grueling, but I usually feel great a couple of hours afterwards. Until then, I feel like a wet rag.

Spots

Today was my second day working out at Black Hills Crossfit. Despite my misgivings, they pushed me to the limit without pushing me too far. The people there are all very supportive. They all seem to know what I'm going through since they started there, too. It's almost like a support group without the group hugs.

I was happy just to get through the "dumbed down" version of the workout of the day. The funny thing is, I find myself wanting to do it again.


Tomorrow.

The Journey Begins

     Welcome.

I started this blog for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is to keep myself accountable to the task I've undertaken. In the interest of full disclosure, let me give you some stats on me: I'm 49 years old, I weigh 311 pounds, I have Type 2 Diabetes, and, like many Americans, I work too many hours, eat too much, and move too little. That brings me to the point of this blog; I am going to lose 100 pounds.

I have fought the "Battle of the Bulge" my entire life. The only time I can remember being in what I consider good shape was when I was in the Army. During that brief period of being in shape, I weighed about 215 pounds and could still have lost a few pounds to go from "in shape" to "in phenomenal shape". Other than that, it's been a (losing) battle to control my weight. Unfortunately, I have 3 major factors against me:

1. Genetics. Pretty much everyone in my family is carrying around too much weight. All of my relatives are Diabetic, and they all suffer from poor diets and lack of exercise. Diabetes is a progressive disease and while I know I can't beat it, I believe I can hold the line against it for a couple of decades. Regardless, I will fight the fight for as long as I am able.
2. Food. I love to eat. I'm a pizzaholic. To me, pizza is a lot like sex; when it's done right, it is AWESOME! When it isn't done right, it's still pretty good. Plus, I grew up in a Sicilian family. Food is huge among Sicilians. The dinner table is where the family congregated and talked about their day, fought, made up, yelled at, and loved each other. And there was food. Lots of it. To go to a Sicilian household is to virtually guarantee that you're going to eat. And you'd better eat a lot. You're on a diet? Not when you walk into a Sicilian house! There will be meat, pasta, salad, and dessert. Food is love, and comfort, and a way to share your wealth. That brings us to another aspect; food is also a way to make one feel better. I can remember my grandmother cooking my favorite dish to make whatever childhood drama I was suffering through diminish. So I have an unhealthy connection to food.
3. Age and decrepitude. I've put this body through a lot of abuse. Jumping out of airplanes, martial arts, 8 years of midnight shifts, back injuries, neck injuries, substance abuse, and on and on. Largely because of these things, I can't workout in a conventional fashion anymore. Heavy weightlifting leaves my joints in agony for days and, at 311 pounds, running is out of the question.

So, those are the obstacles in my way. However, I have enlisted what I think are some powerful allies in this fight. The first is Bahr Chiropractic Wellness Center. Owned and operated by Dr. Kimberly Bahr, it's a place where the focus is on total wellness as opposed to treating just one symptom or problem. Dr. Bahr will be advising me on nutrition and vitamin supplements that will complement the medications I have been prescribed by my Endocrinologist.

The next ally is Black Hills Crossfit. The Crossfit philosophy is to exercise utilizing movements that you do every day anyway. If you check out their videos, you'll see what they're about. To be honest, for the first time in my life, I'm intimidated. These people are waaay ahead of me in their journeys and frankly, it's an uncomfortable feeling to walk into a place where all of the women are more than capable of kicking my ass. BUT, my discussion with the owner, Justin Perkins, has convinced me that Crossfit will meet me where I'm at and bring me along.

The next, and probably most important allies, are my friends, family, and anyone reading this blog. I've got to be frank, I've started stuff before and haven't followed through. At this stage of my life, I look back at the half-finished and incomplete things I've abandoned and I'm not too proud of it. It's become a pattern in my life and I want to break out of it. Any and all advice will be appreciated, even if I don't follow it all.  

Then there is the fear of the unknown. For instance, nutrition: As the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20,
 "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; ²⁰ you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."
Well, I haven't treated my body like a temple, I've treated it more like a garbage dump. So, I need to explore some possibilities with changing my diet to maximize my efforts at the gym. One thing I've discovers already is that the traditional food pyramid that the government has been promoting since I was a kid is almost 100% wrong. Now I have to figure out what's right. Remember my love affair with food? Changing my diet probably means giving up a bunch of things that I love, like Mexican food, Italian food, Asian food, and pizza. A life of eating bland, tasteless food is not something I look forward to, but the alternative is continued obesity and all of the baggage that brings with it.

In any case, I will be updating my progress at least once a week, more if anything significant happens. The secret now is to overcome my fear of change and take my ego out of the equation and just do the work.